The joys of fatherhood for first single black man to adopt a child

Photograph: Courtesy Aloy Gowne

34 year old Aloy Gowne is the first single black male to adopt a child through the adoption agency Procare.

Gowne says he is often asked why he has gone this route. he says most people grow up being told you have to follow a mainstream path, get married and have children, and focus on your career as well.

I suppose I didn't grow up that way. I had lovely grandparents who always said that you can decided your future.

Aloy Gowne

He says he feels fortunate that everything he has ever done feels right for him.

I think that's why I am happily single.

Aloy Gowne

You get to a point in your life where you feel like you are being selfish with your life. There's so much more you can do. There's so much contribution you can make to society.

Aloy Gowne

Aloy Gowne says he has always wanted to be a dad. He says he has felt this for the past 10 years, and the right relationship just did not come along.

His nieces and nephews have always gravitated to him for nurturing and comfort, and he realised he would be a good parent.

He researched the agencies out there and settled on Procare. And it was not as difficult or intimidating as people may assume.

It was the most fantastic process that I have ever been through, and i can recommend it to anyone.

Aloy Gowne

His baby was eight months old when Gowne adopted him, three months ago.

He says at first he was more concerned his son would not accept him, but it turned out to be a wonderful meeting.

I was told he had a fighting spirit and made his own choices, but at the first meeting he grabbed my nose, and I felt very relaxed. He didn't cry, and literally sat in my lap and at some point fell asleep...for me it was more about him choosing me.

Aloy Gowne

He has changed many nappies and been through many sleepless nights, but says he has had help.

His son's foster parents, known as kangaroo parents, took care of the little one in the first few months until the child is ready for adoption. he says they have been an enormous support.

Everybody has been willing to offer help and advice when I have needed it.

Aloy Gowne

He says he and his son had to go for an assessment after a time to see how the boding was going.

The psychologist looked at us and said there is no doubt, you guys are like a match made in heaven.

Aloy Gowne

When he wakes up in the morning and he looks at me, or he just wants to touch me, or kiss me, or hug me, I know he has chosen me to be his dad.

Aloy Gowne

Listen to the entire conversation below:

Read More
Child spanking outlawed as court scraps use of 'reasonable chastisement' defence

Child spanking outlawed as court scraps use of 'reasonable chastisement' defence

The defence of reasonable chastisement of children has been declared unconstitutional in the Johannesburg High Court on Thursday.

SPCA expected to probe illegal bush racing in WC after Carte Blanche expose

SPCA expected to probe illegal bush racing in WC after Carte Blanche expose

The sport, which appears to be popular in the province, forces retired racing horses to run on tar roads for gambling purposes.

Ramaphosa responds to rumors that he will pushed out of office next

Ramaphosa responds to rumors that he will pushed out of office next

Deputy President Cyril Ramaphosa addressed the growing rumors that he might be the next to be booted from Pres. Zuma's executive.

WATCH: Robben Island gets solar farm and goes green

WATCH: Robben Island gets solar farm and goes green

The island previously relied solely on diesel generators and has transitioned to solar energy, solar expert Dom Wills explains.

Smoke alarms reduce risk of deaths in shack fires, says researcher

Smoke alarms reduce risk of deaths in shack fires, says researcher

Researcher Patricia Zweig says smoke alarm can either catch fires and put them out or give shack dwellers enough time to escape.

Stellies 'worm whizz' wants to know what fisherfolk use on their hooks

Stellies 'worm whizz' wants to know what fisherfolk use on their hooks

A marine biologist is leading a survey which aims to gain a better understanding of the demand on worms as bait along the coast.

Popular articles
Meet Whitey Basson (the retail guru who turned Shoprite into a R127bn behemoth)

Meet Whitey Basson (the retail guru who turned Shoprite into a R127bn behemoth)

The Money Show’s Bruce Whitfield interviews the former CEO of Africa’s largest retailer by far.

CT airport shooting attempted hit on gang boss allegedly linked to '28s' -expert

CT airport shooting attempted hit on gang boss allegedly linked to '28s' -expert

A policing expert explains that the airport shooting may be linked to the shooting at a Stellenbosch nightclub this past weekend.

Almost 30 million SA ID numbers compromised after site hacked

Almost 30 million SA ID numbers compromised after site hacked

Independent Marketing Consultant in the Technology Space, Andrew Fraser says this looks like a leak and not a hack.

Cape Town International Airport shooting could be gang related - ACSA

Cape Town International Airport shooting could be gang related - ACSA

The incident happened in the early hours of Wednesday morning.

Kloof Street residents living in fear as crime multiplies

Kloof Street residents living in fear as crime multiplies

A Cape Town man was stabbed to death on Saturday while trying to assist two women who were being mugged on Kloof street.