Rebuilding trust after your partner cheats

Redi Tlhabi's conversation was triggered by an email she received from a woman who, five years on, is still battling to rebuild trust and intimacy with her partner who cheated.

Callers phoned in to share their own stories about infidelity and the difficulties they have faced trying to heal their relationships in the aftermath.

It is difficult, especially when you have been contacted by the other woman. it is difficult to trust. i'm not the kind of person who goes through my partner's phone, but since then, I do that.

Eliza from Johannesburg, caller

Eliza says the minute her partner leaves she starts asking herself, where is he, what's he doing and who is he with?

But she says with patience and commitment on the part of both partners, she believes after infidelity, it is possible to rebuild the relationship.

Once you've broken that trust, there's no going back, because the aggrieved partner will always want to go out there and double check and look over her shoulder all the time.

Thatelo from Kensington, Caller

Thatelo says love is not enough. Trust is key, and without it, a relationship will not work.

I am in that situation where I did break the trust, and I must say it is a tough situation. It has been two years ongoing where I am trying to rebuild the relationship...and rebuilding trust is the hardest thing you can ever do.

Abie from Johannesburg, caller

Abie says you have to be prepared to call and tell your partner where you are and who you are with all the time.

If you are cheated on, you immediately go into this defence mechanism and say how can they do this to me? But you have to look at what is going on in your relationship at the time of this affair.

Greg in Killarney, caller

Greg suggests that while you may think everything seemed fine in your relationship, something deep down may be missing. He does not condone infidelity, but he says in our complicated and busy lives, needs are not always met within relationships.

Listen to the full conversation below:

Read More
Maternal deaths caused by unsafe abortion a cry for reproductive justice

Maternal deaths caused by unsafe abortion a cry for reproductive justice

Two medical experts unpack the importance of reproductive justice in SA and recognising a woman's right to choose.

[LISTEN] Naked Scientist tells us how dreaming occurs and why people sleeptalk

[LISTEN] Naked Scientist tells us how dreaming occurs and why people sleeptalk

Naked scientist Chris Smith explains brain activity associated with dreaming, as well as why you are likely to talk in your sleep.

LISTEN: Debate on Mabulu's latest work and what constitutes art

LISTEN: Debate on Mabulu's latest work and what constitutes art

Ayanda Mabulu has drawn controversy once again over his latest painting depicting Nelson Mandela in a sexually explicit position.

Picking apart Ramaphosa's strong words on 'radical economic transformation'

Picking apart Ramaphosa's strong words on 'radical economic transformation'

Deputy President Cyril Ramaphosa told detractors of radical economic transformation to sit down. Karima Brown gives her analysis.

Young slam poets paint an uplifting picture with their spoken word

Young slam poets paint an uplifting picture with their spoken word

Four young wordsmiths from the SA poetry house 'Current State Of Poetry' gave presenter Eusebius McKaiser a lesson in slam poetry.

"Being colourblind is dangerous"

"Being colourblind is dangerous"

Author and human rights advocate Sisonke Msimang grapples with South Africa's failed rainbow nation ideal and how to build it.

Popular articles
New evidence comes to light in Ipid's probe against top cop

New evidence comes to light in Ipid's probe against top cop

Ipid has revealed that evidence against Khomotso Phahlane shows a dubious pattern in car purchases.

Still no trace of missing Charlotte Nikoi, one month on

Still no trace of missing Charlotte Nikoi, one month on

The husband of missing Charlotte Nikoi has pleaded with public to come forward with any information regarding her whereabouts.

[Watch] All the Foreshore Freeway Project proposals

[Watch] All the Foreshore Freeway Project proposals

Take a look at the 6 six proposals that have been received by the City for the Foreshore freeway precinct.

We are in denial of people marching against us - Lindiwe Sisulu

We are in denial of people marching against us - Lindiwe Sisulu

Human Settlements Minister criticised the ANC for being passive at the memorial of late struggle stalwart Amhed Kathrada.

How does El Nino affect Western Cape province?

How does El Nino affect Western Cape province?

Professor William Landman explains what El Nino is and its effects on the coming seasons in the Western Cape.

City of Cape Town ratepayers to face new tariff increases

City of Cape Town ratepayers to face new tariff increases

The free 6Kl of water per month will no longer apply to ratepayers owning property valued at R400 000.

'Land restitution failed because Government is the biggest owner of land'

'Land restitution failed because Government is the biggest owner of land'

Bruce Whitfield interviews Finance Minister Malusi Gigaba's advisor Chris Malikane and Business Leadership SA's Bonang Mohale.