6 skills your child needs when revisiting the topic of ‘Stranger Danger’

Parenting expert Mia Von Scha says that when we think about the horrors that could happen to our children, we generally think about strangers. She adds that we have been conditioned as children and adults not to speak to strangers.

Von Scha says that parents generally tell their children not to talk to strangers, and either implicitly or explicitly tell them that strange men are the greatest threat. However, most paedophiles are not strangers she adds, they can be family members, friends , other children or even women.

When we actually look at the statistics, the majority of your paedophiles are actually not strangers to the child, it’s somebody that you know.

Mia Von Scha, parenting expert

Von Scha says that we need to make children aware that your private parts are private, which means that nobody can touch, look or play with your private parts.

Von Scha highlight 6 tips that parents can use which are better than preaching ‘Stranger Danger.’

1. Carrying themselves with confidence:

We teach confidence by allowing children to do things for themselves, by giving them independence, and by describing their achievements without praising them.

2. Body integrity:

Children need to know that their body is theirs and nobody gets to do anything to it without their consent. Von Scha says that if we really want to train our children about body integrity, we have to start when they are little. She adds that this requires asking if you can wash them, and you need to respect their decision if they say no.

3.Trusting their instincts:

We need to teach our children to tune into this wisdom and to trust it. We do this by listening to them when they say they don’t feel like doing something, or respecting them when they don’t want to be around a particular person

4. Voicing their opinion:

Children need to know that “no” means “no” and the only way to learn this is if we allow them to say it and respect them when they do. As adults, we tend to override children’s decisions says Von Scha. She adds that children can see when adults get to say no but when they say no, it doesn’t seem to count.

The key point to take away is if they say no, it means no. We need them to learn that their no actually means something.

Mia Von Scha, parenting expert

5. Knowing what to do in an emergency:

The best way to teach these skills is to play role playing games or even use puppets or toys to act out different scenarios. Let your kids come up with ideas for what they would do and then discuss these with them.

6. Be able to defend themselves:

I honestly believe that every child should have some martial arts or self-defense training in their lives. Knowing how to handle ourselves in difficult situations gives us the kind of confidence that is very off-putting to predators.

Click on the audio below for more examples...


This article first appeared on 702 : 6 skills your child needs when revisiting the topic of ‘Stranger Danger’


Recommended

by THE NEWSROOM

CapeTalk welcomes all comments that are constructive, contribute to discussions in a meaningful manner and take stories forward.

However, we will NOT condone the following:

  • Racism (including offensive comments based on ethnicity and nationality)
  • Sexism
  • Homophobia
  • Religious intolerance
  • Cyber bullying
  • Hate speech
  • Derogatory language
  • Comments inciting violence.

We ask that your comments remain relevant to the articles they appear on and do not include general banter or conversation as this dilutes the effectiveness of the comments section.

We strive to make the CapeTalk community a safe and welcoming space for all.

CapeTalk reserves the right to: 1) remove any comments that do not follow the above guidelines; and, 2) ban users who repeatedly infringe the rules.

Should you find any comments upsetting or offensive you can also flag them and we will assess it against our guidelines.

CapeTalk is constantly reviewing its comments policy in order to create an environment conducive to constructive conversations.

Read More
Medical doctor unpacks how to successfully have ‘The birds and the bees’ talk

Medical doctor unpacks how to successfully have ‘The birds and the bees’ talk

‘It’s often in that initial reaction that we set the tone for future engagement with children.' - Doctor Tlaleng Mofokeng

[WATCH] The yummy mummy’s guide to surviving the first week back at school

[WATCH] The yummy mummy’s guide to surviving the first week back at school

In the food feature, Anna Trapido talks about the Leopard Deli's readymade meals, and why they're perfect for back to school lunch

Helping your kids set meaningful goals for the year

Helping your kids set meaningful goals for the year

Parenting coach at transformational parenting, Mia Von Scha chats about setting goals for your children without imposing.

Single parents (moms and dads) open up about legal battles, maintenance woes

Single parents (moms and dads) open up about legal battles, maintenance woes

A family lawyer sheds light on effects of single parenting, child maintenance rights and the legalities of raising kids jointly.

Parental vigilance essential in averting drug-addicted kids, psychologist says

Parental vigilance essential in averting drug-addicted kids, psychologist says

Drug addiction doesn't discriminate and can affect any family. Khosi Jiyane explores difficulties parenting kids hooked on drugs.

Preparing your child for a world of no guarantees

Preparing your child for a world of no guarantees

Aubrey Masango chats to creative parenting expert, Nikki Bush about preparing children for a world of no guarantees.

Popular articles
[WATCH] Grootes's take on why EFF silent on Dlamini's SABC interview

[WATCH] Grootes's take on why EFF silent on Dlamini's SABC interview

702 Afternoon Drive host Stephen Grootes's comment involves past dealings that involve EFF national chair, Advocate Dali Mpofu.

Punitive tariff hike for water guzzlers to hit CT households where it hurts

Punitive tariff hike for water guzzlers to hit CT households where it hurts

Harsher punitive tariffs on the cards as 'Day Zero' becomes a reality as the result of 60% of Capetonians who ignore water limits.

Madiba’s private secretary Zelda la Grange opens up about money (hers and his)

Madiba’s private secretary Zelda la Grange opens up about money (hers and his)

Bruce Whitfield interviews La Grange about her and Madiba's attitude to money (hopes and fears, successes and failures, etc.)

WATCH: Innovative spray limits toilet flushes and saves water

WATCH: Innovative spray limits toilet flushes and saves water

Loo Me is a simple yet effective scented foam that takes the yuck out of "mellowing" toilets preventing multiple flushes.

I was not introduced to Ajay Gupta - Grootes

I was not introduced to Ajay Gupta - Grootes

Stephen Grootes says he believes former Eskom CEO Brian Dames when said he was not formally introduced to the Gupta family.

It's not the end of the road... Top tips to improve your matric

It's not the end of the road... Top tips to improve your matric

"Recognise that it’s not the end, it’s the beginning." Expert advise for school-leavers who want to improve their results.