'Everyone told me I can't be bi' - experiences of black bisexual men in SA

Bisexual people are often invisibilised and face a great deal of stigma in society.

Black bisexual men in South Africa, in particular, are generally misunderstood and can find it challenging to gain acceptance.

Activist Mpho Ndaba, software developer Kabelo Thwala and photographer Youri Sunguza share their experiences of being bi, black men.

Read: 'Bisexuals are so stigmatised in the LGBTI community'

Ndaba says he was 16 when he made sense of his sexuality, however, he was not able to fully come into himself or live openly at that stage.

Read also: Misconceptions about bisexuality that need to be corrected

Thwala says he struggled with understanding his feelings until he found a discreet digital community where he could learn more about bisexuality.

It was only at university that Ndaba and Thwala began to form their identity and explore their sexuality.

Sunguza says he first suspected that he was gay until he was exposed to the notion of bisexuality late in high school.

The trio spoke about their experiences of being invalidated and of coming out, as well as the stereotypes and complexities that come with their sexuality.

There's also cultural factors that you need to take into account in terms of what is an acceptable masculinity.

Mpho Ndaba, activist working in media policy work and environmental justice

I've always known that I was bisexual, even as a kid. When I was 16 I was able to find the language to articulate and understand who I am. I'm glad that I was able to do that earlier in my life.

Mpho Ndaba, activist working in media policy work and environmental justice

As much as I understood who I was then, it was difficult to live that life... I've gotten used to the questions.

Mpho Ndaba, activist working in media policy work and environmental justice

In high school, I never thought of sexuality as a thing. I always knew there was something different about me.

Kabelo Thwala, software developer and user experience designer

I never really thought that being bisexual was a possibility... Grade 12 was the year where I came into myself and I realised that I can be into both girls and guys.

Youri Sunguza, photographer

Everyone told me I can't be bi.

Youri Sunguza, photographer

Listen to the insightful conversation on The Eusebius McKaiser Show:


Recommended

by NEWSROOM AI
Read More
'Punitive action not the best response for employees battling with alcoholism'

'Punitive action not the best response for employees battling with alcoholism'

This HR exec says bosses needs to be more supportive towards staff affected by alcoholism, substance abuse or any other addiction.

Daniels admits wrongdoing: 'I signed off invoices for Ngubeni's legal fees'

Daniels admits wrongdoing: 'I signed off invoices for Ngubeni's legal fees'

Eskom's former legal head Suzanne Daniels speaks to Eusebius McKaiser about signing controversial legal fees for then Eskom chair.

South Africa is leadership bankrupt, says Bonang Mohale

South Africa is leadership bankrupt, says Bonang Mohale

Business Leadership SA CEO Bonang Mohale has called out black leaders in the country who use their blackness for selfish gains.

Undecided voter? Let the data guide you, says James-Brent Styan

Undecided voter? Let the data guide you, says James-Brent Styan

Author and government spokesperson James-Brent Styan shares his views on how South Africans should determine their vote in May.

[LISTEN] Talking Sex: 'Bisexuals are so stigmatised in the LGBTI community'

[LISTEN] Talking Sex: 'Bisexuals are so stigmatised in the LGBTI community'

Power FM's Nolwazi Tusini and HOLA Africa's Tiffany Mugo join Eusebius to debunk some of the stigmas surrounding bisexuality.

Misconceptions about bisexuality that need to be corrected

Misconceptions about bisexuality that need to be corrected

Clinical sexologist Dr Eve debunks the myths around bisexuality and talks about the discrimination bisexual people often face.

Popular articles
Eskom: WhatsApp message about Thursday 'blackout' is fake news

Eskom: WhatsApp message about Thursday 'blackout' is fake news

Eskom's head of generation, Andrew Etzinger, says the WhatsApp message doing the rounds about a blackout is misinformation.

What are the rules and regulations when it comes to owning a generator?

What are the rules and regulations when it comes to owning a generator?

A listener on the Afternoon Drive has shared his frustrations with a neighbor's noisy generator and the health risks it posed.

Eskom and authorities have to plan for worst case scenario, says energy expert

Eskom and authorities have to plan for worst case scenario, says energy expert

Analyst Chris Yelland says South Africans should be comforted and not alarmed by the fact that Eskom has made contingency plans.

Distraught caller describes harrowing experience on Baden Powell Drive

Distraught caller describes harrowing experience on Baden Powell Drive

A CapeTalk caller explained to Lester Kiewit how he went through flames and over rocks, and debris to escape his car being stoned.

What's next with Jacob Zuma's corruption charges trial?

What's next with Jacob Zuma's corruption charges trial?

Investigative journalist, Karyn Maughan, reflects on a year since charges against former President Jacob Zuma were reinstated.

Kilometres of boiler tube leaks 'are biting us big time' says Eskom COO

Kilometres of boiler tube leaks 'are biting us big time' says Eskom COO

Eskom's Jan Oberholzer says it has discovered boiler tube leaks which continue for kilometres and is working to repair this.

Here's how to check your load shedding schedule in Cape Town

Here's how to check your load shedding schedule in Cape Town

Eskom has warned that more power cuts can be expected as maintenance continues over the next twelve months.