How to manage conflicts in a relationship

Conflicts and disagreements may result in us becoming angry, and they may also arise because we have become angry about something else. At work, we might try to control our anger and avoid saying things we might regret. At home, unfortunately, we are much more likely to say hurtful things to others as a result.

Speaking to Phemelo on the Weekend Breakfast, clinical psychologist - Khosi Jiyane said we must start to worry when conflict becomes a divider and not a builder.

It is given in any relationships to have fights because there are two people with two opinions. Difference is normal and given, it when that difference becomes mutually exclusive when we are in opposing opinions. Which then raises the stakes in terms of what happens to the two individuals.

Khosi Jiyane - clinical psychologist

As human beings we are hard wired for survival, and the same part of the brain that reacts when we are threatened physically is the same part of the brain that reacts when we are threatened psychologically and emotionally. When we find ourselves in strong opposing opinions with each other, it then triggers the same reaction. So we will either go into fight or flight or freeze. So flight and freeze are the avoidance mechanisms.

Khosi Jiyane - clinical psychologist

Jiyane said: trouble and conflict are not a natural way of our being individually and also in relationships. As much as they are unavoidable, they are not a natural reason or intention for a relationship.

Click below to listen to the full interview:


This article first appeared on 702 : How to manage conflicts in a relationship


Recommended

by NEWSROOM AI
Read More
Letting go and moving on after a relationship ends

Letting go and moving on after a relationship ends

Clinical psychologist Dimakatso Maboea discusses ways to accept a breakup and avoid the triggers that could set you back.

[LISTEN] Nuclear scientist Senamile Masango on overcoming race and gender bias

[LISTEN] Nuclear scientist Senamile Masango on overcoming race and gender bias

The PHD candidate talks about her journey from rural Nongoma to top in her field.

Why playing board games with your child is important (and fun!)

Why playing board games with your child is important (and fun!)

Parenting expert Nikki Bush explores the life lessons to be had from spending quality game time with kids.

Science students should be looking at ways to create jobs - professor

Science students should be looking at ways to create jobs - professor

Prof. Senamile Masango talks about her Standard Bank Top Women award and her vision of marrying science and entrepreneurship.

Weighing up the cost and the benefit of a loyalty programme

Weighing up the cost and the benefit of a loyalty programme

Certified financial planner Paul Roelofse on choosing and unlocking the value of loyalty programmes.

'SA has to become more efficient in managing its water resources'

'SA has to become more efficient in managing its water resources'

The Future Water Institute's Dr Kevin Winter says the current spread of agriculture should be reviewed.

Popular articles
'Unhappiness with WC administration opportune moment to revive ANC in province'

'Unhappiness with WC administration opportune moment to revive ANC in province'

The ANC's Amos Phago says party to address challenges of racism and factionalism identified in Western Cape branches.

Letting go and moving on after a relationship ends

Letting go and moving on after a relationship ends

Clinical psychologist Dimakatso Maboea discusses ways to accept a breakup and avoid the triggers that could set you back.

[LISTEN] SA's Ndlovu Youth Choir through to America's Got Talent semi-finals

[LISTEN] SA's Ndlovu Youth Choir through to America's Got Talent semi-finals

The choir has been wowing TV audiences in the US and across the world with their energetic performances.

Surfer comes up with insp-EYE-ring way to ward off sharks - take a look!

Surfer comes up with insp-EYE-ring way to ward off sharks - take a look!

Large eye stickers are being stuck to the bottom of surfboards in order to deter sharks.

'Ramaphosa wants to find ways to force pension fund managers to invest in SOEs'

'Ramaphosa wants to find ways to force pension fund managers to invest in SOEs'

Daily Maverick associate editor at Scorpio Sikonathi Mantshantsha takes a look at the week's financial news.

[WATCH] Ndlovu Youth Choir shines once again with latest AGT performance

[WATCH] Ndlovu Youth Choir shines once again with latest AGT performance

The inspiring South African choirU2's Beautiful Day at America's Got Talent quarter-finals.

SA’s richest woman opens up about being a refugee and becoming a billionaire

SA’s richest woman opens up about being a refugee and becoming a billionaire

Magda Wierzycka – Sygnia’s renegade CEO – on her attitude toward money (hopes and fears, successes and failures, etc.).