Intimacy in relationships plays a central role in the overall human experience. An intimate relationship usually satisfies the desire to love and to belong. A perceived lack of intimacy is one of the most common reasons for relationship breakdowns.
Dr Eve explains different forms of intimacy and their importance on the Redi Tlhabi Show:
Unfortunately we live in a time where there isn’t time. Intimacy seems to be side-tracked a little and people think that being sexual and penetrative is being intimate. And that is not the case at all.— Dr Eve, clinical sexologist
According to Dr Eve, intimacy doesn’t happen automatically but it takes honour and interest in the next person. It has to be mutual, she says. She adds that intimacy requires a deep amount of time and commitment.
Dr Eve further said that a relationship without intimacy remains superficial and shallow and people end up finding hyper personal intimacy online.
Dr Eve asked whether it is necessary to disclose everything to your partner (trauma, past relationships)?
According to Dr Eve, people should cherish their individuality and at the same time be able to be intimate with their partners without losing themselves.
Mitchell in Cape Town has been in a relationship for five years. He says his partner spends time on social media and currently realised there are friendships that are randomly popping up over social media. He is insecure and doesn't know how to tackle the problem.
Sbu in Fourways has been married for eight years. He says that his partner is not intimate at all. He feels unwanted by his partner which he believes has led to his cheating behaviour because he wanted to find some kind of validation from a different person.
Here are some of the twitter responses to the topic:
@RediTlhabi I'm in an inter-racial relationship, I sometimes feel like she's less intimate towards me, does race play a role?— White Shirt (@gerneside) June 26, 2015
@RediTlhabi 4me,it is about deep emotional connection between the concerned parties.The ability 2 converse openly wit each other abt anythng— Tiisetso Nkalai (@TiisetsoNkalai) June 26, 2015
@RediTlhabi Intimacy is a miracle of two hearts in love sharing the rapturous intertwined sweet emotions of Togetherness!— SydneyG (@MannaTitbits) June 26, 2015
Listen to the full conversation on The Redi Tlhabi Show: