How do you stand up for yourself without coming across as aggressive?

Standing up for yourself can be pretty difficult, especially when faced with confronting people very close to you.

Being assertive means that you express yourself effectively and stand up for your point of view, while also respecting the rights and beliefs of others.

CapeTalk/702’s Redi Tlhabi spoke to Dr Helgo Schomer about being assertive without being aggressive, rude or coming across as too harsh.

According to Dr Schomer, aggressive behaviour is self-promoting, passive behaviour is self-depreciating and assertive behaviour is self-enhancing.

Dr Schomer says that an assertive behaviour creates a win-win situation for those involved and people need to know how say important things.

Every human being on this planet needs to have their say

Dr Helgo Schomer, resident psychologist

Listen to the full conversation below:

5 tips to being assertive:

  • You don’t have to yell to mean it

  • Speak from the heart

  • You don’t have to raise your voice to be heard

  • Don’t demand that people help you, ask them to do it – be polite

  • Don’t give up

This article first appeared on 702 : How do you stand up for yourself without coming across as aggressive?


Read More
#ANC54 Three CNN journalists intimidated, threatened with arrest

#ANC54 Three CNN journalists intimidated, threatened with arrest

The group are said to have crossed a barricade separating delegates from journalists, before being ushered to a room.

#ANC54 The bigger the body the harder it is to make decisions - Stephen Grootes

#ANC54 The bigger the body the harder it is to make decisions - Stephen Grootes

Political reporter and talk show host Stephen Grootes reviews some of the proposed changes around the ANC's NEC.

The link between materialism and happiness

The link between materialism and happiness

Materialism can take a toll on our well-being, relationships and quality of life. Dr Schomer explores the effects of materialism.

What is 'Ghosting' and how to deal with it

What is 'Ghosting' and how to deal with it

Psychologists explain that ghosting is when the relationship is cut off completely, with no reason whatsoever, by one person.

Don't like being told what to do? Dr Schomer talks the science of giving advice

Don't like being told what to do? Dr Schomer talks the science of giving advice

Dr Schomer looks at the the science of giving advice, how it is received, the reactions it gets and its shortcomings.

 Obsession with perfectionism not good - Dr Schomer

Obsession with perfectionism not good - Dr Schomer

Dr Schomer talks about how obsession with perfectionism can bite back at you.

Popular articles
'Banned ANC delegates have shot themselves in the foot, got what they deserved'

'Banned ANC delegates have shot themselves in the foot, got what they deserved'

Deputy Editor of Financial Mail, Sikonathi Mantshantsha says branches were warned but did not listen, and he has no sympathy.

Adam Habib: Where would the money to fund free education come from?

Adam Habib: Where would the money to fund free education come from?

Vice-Chancellor of Wits University Adam Habib says Zuma's promise requires about R40 billion in order to be fulfilled.

[LISTEN] 'I never wanted to be President, I was not ambitious'

[LISTEN] 'I never wanted to be President, I was not ambitious'

Listen to what President Zuma had to say on Friday at the #ANC54 Gala Dinner ahead of the elective conference.

JUST IN: Some delegates barred from voting #ANC54

JUST IN: Some delegates barred from voting #ANC54

ANC secretary-general Gwede Mantashe announced that some delegates will not be able to vote in this weekend's elective conference.

Van Damme: De Lille has until Monday to respond to maladministration claims

Van Damme: De Lille has until Monday to respond to maladministration claims

The DA has suspended Patricia de Lille from party activities but Eusebius McKaiser says its statement 'is clear as mud'.

LISTEN: Father of drowned toddler speaks of dangers and heartbreak

LISTEN: Father of drowned toddler speaks of dangers and heartbreak

Connor Weber, fell unnoticed into a bin of water and drowned.

Predictably awesome new Nando's ad reminds South Africans ‘we can fix our sh$t’

Predictably awesome new Nando's ad reminds South Africans ‘we can fix our sh$t’

Watch the Guptas pack their bags and run in Nando's inspiring new advertisement.